you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
ttyl tear gas
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
