Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize
