i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
