i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
