Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
