Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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