grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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