"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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