dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
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It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
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The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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