i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
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note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
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Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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