The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
