So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
