it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
