Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...