no. you can't hotbox the world.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
