With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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