So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
