All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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