My liver just broke up with me...
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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