Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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