There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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