I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize