Moan for me like Helen Keller
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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