I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
