At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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