no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
