The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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