oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
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She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
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I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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