Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
oh god was she eating orange peels again
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
