Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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