Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize