So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Randomize