The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Randomize
