Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
it hurts more in the daytime
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
