You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
