idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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