I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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