I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize