we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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