Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
