careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
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We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
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He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
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