my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
