My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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