Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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