Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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