Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
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