he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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