She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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