so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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