so that wasnt chicken after all
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize