haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
