oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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